Comparing Apples and Oranges

Comparing Apples and Oranges

fruit-424184_1920 smart copy copyIf you were really honest with yourself how much of your time do you spend comparing apples and oranges? What on earth and I talking about? The time that you spend comparing yourself to someone else that you think is smarter, more successful a better mom or wife and on and on. I may or may not be guilty of doing this myself. Ok, I am actually guilty. It’s not something I set out to do, it just seems to kind of happen. One minute I will be admiring someone’s Like Page on Facebook or scrolling their Instagram feed and then the next thing I know an hour has past of me comparing what their life “appears” to be like with mine really is like and it leaves me feeling completely deflated. But truly all I am doing is comparing apples to oranges because God didn’t make me like them! So, how does one stop living a life of comparison?

First, you MUST learn your own value and be completely grounded in that. If you are a Christian your value comes from Jesus. And here is the key to that, you have the value whether or not you choose to believe it. I would say for someone to give up their life just so they could have a relationship with you that puts you pretty much at the top of the valuable list. BUT for you to believe your value is completely different than the fact that you already are valuable. Sounds cray huh? What do I mean by this? Have you ever heard of someone going to a garage sale and picking up some small tchotchke for like a buck and then find out later that little thing is worth millions? It was always worth millions before the person sold it at the garage sale, but seller was clueless it had any value more than a buck. They were probably actually happy to get a buck for it and get it out of their house. That is what I am talking about having value but not realizing it so we settle in a state of mind that others are worth more and deserve more than we do. Yet that is simply not true. You need to discover the price that has been paid for you and all the promises that are yours because that price has been paid. And then you have believe it’s for you. Sometimes it’s a long hard journey to get to that place, but the trip, as long and hard as it is will be so worth it.

When we get caught in the web of comparison it keeps us prisoner to a false belief that we are not good enough or worthy of enough the way God made us to be as successful (whatever success looks like to you) as the person we have chosen to compare ourselves to. Bottom line is this, you have a different gift and talent, a different fingerprint and iris and as a matter of fact everything about you God created specifically and uniquely to you. He doesn’t want you trying to be someone else. The more you chase after another person’s identity and success the more yours will elude you. God wants you to chase after Him (Matt 6:33) because He is your only true comparison. His word tells us that we were created in HIS likeness, not the air brushed super model on the cover of a magazine who is usually broken in on the inside, they just don’t show us that.

So ask yourself this question, why would you want to take what God created only one of, on purpose, and try to make it look like someone else? You would then no longer be uniquely you. He wants you to find your purpose, value and worth in comparing yourself to the only one worth comparing yourself to and that is Christ. And who you are in Christ has a value worth dying for.

By the way, in case you didn’t know, He calls YOU His masterpiece (Ephesians 2:10) because to Him you are fearfully and wonderfully made just by being you (Psalm 139:14).

Forgiveness is YOUR Ultimate Freedom

Forgiveness is YOUR Ultimate Freedom

I forgive you


I completely believe in forgiveness, in all circumstances. Why? Because I actually think it is necessary if you are going to have a healthy, flourishing life you must forgive. Here are a few observations I have about forgiveness that perhaps differ from your perspective.

  • Forgiveness is a choice, it doesn’t just happen, you must choose it.
  • Forgiveness is for the forgiver, not the offender.
  • Forgiveness does not make what the other person did ok, it makes you free.
  • Forgiveness does not always mean restoration. Sometimes what was can no longer be not because of unforgiveness but because of wisdom.
  • Forgiveness, once chosen, doesn’t necessarily mean your heart will change right away. That takes time and God.
  • Forgiveness is something you must do if you want to be forgiven, Matthew 6:14.
  • Forgiveness is something you might need to with yourself. We often forget we need to sometimes forgive ourselves!
  • Forgiveness is non negotiable if you ever want to be whole.
  • Forgiveness, on occasion, has meant ME needing to forgive God. HE NEVER needs my forgiveness because He is perfect, but that’s doesn’t  mean I haven’t needed to forgive Him. (This one may not sit well with you and that’s ok. If you ever experience this, you will definitely have an ahha moment!)

Forgiveness is not always easy, especially when you have been deeply wounded by someone. But there is nothing that will heal that wound like forgiveness. I actually think the wound will never heal without it. You don’t have to forgive but don’t ever expect to feel whole until you do. Remember forgiveness is something that you do for yourself. God knows what the other person has done so you don’t have to make it your mission in life to make the other person pay, that will only cost you. They will never be able to pay enough to make that wound inside of you healed. But God can heal it and that’s exactly what He wants to do but it starts with your forgiveness. Don’t be afraid to forgive because you worry it will let someone else off the hook. That is a trap of darkness. Pssst, you also don’t have to go that person and say directly to them, “I forgive you”. That might be part of the process, and it might not. Make the choice and then trust God to guide you from there! Forgiveness is where your ultimate freedom begins!

Only 70 Days Left!

Only 70 Days Left!

project 50(4)Wow, it’s hard to believe that in only 70 days I will be turning another decade older which equates to a half a century!! Whuuuuut!!! It seems unreal to me at times.

My 49th year has been a doozy though so I can actually say I am ready to exit the 40s and enter my 50s. This past year has been full of unexpected and unwelcomed surprises.

I had begged my husband for years and years to stop smoking to no avail. He would always say one day. But one day turned into my husband being diagnosed with renal cancer in May. This diagnosis came right after his resignation as president of a company. We had just celebrated the idea of him entering into a new and prosperous season in his career. But that’s not at all what happened, instead it meant I had an unemployed husband with a diagnosis of an untreatable cancer. Let’s just say there have been A LOT of sleepless nights and tearful prayers since then. Our lives took a nose dive and have been a roller coaster ever since.

I am grateful for my faith because without it there is no telling what path I would have taken to help elevate all the stress and pain I felt from going through the hardest season of my life. Because of my relationship with Christ I was able to rise above myself and allow the Holy Spirit, through me, to love on my husband in what was the darkest season of his life. It was in no way easy, but God showed Himself faithful in the outcome. My husband was declared cancer free as of about a month ago. Now it’s all about honoring God with our lives to show Him how grateful we are that He spared Harvey’s life. In a nutshell, it’s time to do whatever needs to be done to live a healthy life full of laughter and love.

My health story, well, I have had a diagnosis for many, many years of Hashimoto’s disease which is a thyroid condition. It is an auto immune disease (in simple terms I have chronic inflammation in my body) and what happens is my immune system actually attacks my thyroid like it’s a foreign object. Most recently however I was diagnosed with adult on set asthma (yep, that’s basically inflammation in my lungs, see a pattern here?) which has been a HUGE blow to my cardiovascular activity. I went from a crazy wild thang in an aerobic setting to being forced to stop and use the rescue inhaler so that I could catch my breath and hopefully finish.

SOOOO….In honor of me turning 50, I have decided to start “Project 50” to set some goals I want to accomplish over the next 70 days. I have decided that I am so worth giving up some instant gratifications so that I can possibly have some long term health benefits by doing so.

Stay tuned as I lay those goals out and share my journey and progress. It’s time to leave the first half century behind me and enter into a whole new half century feeling vibrant and healthy. I say…out with the old and in with the new!


UPgraded & Paid in Full

UPgraded & Paid in Full


As most of you know this past year has been a doozy for me. Between starting a new position, traveling for work, going to school, and helping my husband through a victory over renal cancer it’s been a year I don’t think I will ever forget.


A Different Choice

A Different Choice

imageI have a lot going on in my life right now and because it’s felt impossible to make it to the gym I have pretty much done NOTHING for a month now. I love my gym & gym family and miss being a part of it but I need to make a different choice in my life for a little while. Now more than ever my health has got to be a priority. So I my choices are:

1. stop working out, or
2. figure it out

2 is the only option for me right now. I decided to checkout Focus T25 because it’s 5 days a week, 25 minutes a day; I think I can swing that one. By working out at home I can be as flexible as I need to over theses next few months.

Feeling hopeful and excited!!!

It’s a Growth Opportunity

It’s a Growth Opportunity

struggle or growth 2Think about this for a second. How many times in life would you say you’ve struggled through a situation? Or can you remember a time you’ve actually grown through a situation? They are two totally different experiences. It’s not to say that if you choose to grow through your circumstances that there won’t be struggles. That’s not what I am talking about. What I am talking about is a mentality as you are going through something. For me, I finally chose the path of growth. It’s not always easy but I have never regretted growing as a person. Not once!

Life could be very different if you and I would look at more situations as growth opportunities instead of as struggles. When we look at a situation from the perspective of a struggle then the outcome will always be different. Usually when we have struggled through something our outlook is from a negative perspective. However when we’ve grown through something we then have something of value to teach and share with others.

When we look at something as a struggle all we want to do is make it through. We have a constant thought of “when will this ever end?” I completely understand that feeling! There has been more than one occasion, actually there have been a lot of occasions when I couldn’t wait for my circumstance to just be over.

After many years I am learning to look at circumstances in my life as lessons instead of just as struggles. I try and see things from a perspective of how can this change me and make me better. How can I come out on top? What can I learn going through this that is valuable and that others will benefit from knowing as they go through the same thing or something similar? If you and I will take on this attitude then we will truly have something to share with others in their time of need. Who knows, you just might be the person who can help someone else turn their life completely around because you chose to grow instead of just struggle.

You can be a victim of your circumstances or you can be a victor of your circumstances. You truly have a choice how you live life. I have chosen to be a victim at points in my life and let me tell you there is no power in that. It’s only when I live a life from the perspective that I will have victory that my life has opened up to great possibilities.

Remember that negativity breeds the same.  What do you want more of in your life?