The Power of 2 Letters

The Power of 2 Letters

God has recently shown me a very toxic thought I have believed about myself my whole life. I have had a deep seeded belief that I was unwanted. I’ve always had this gnawing sense that I was unplanned, unwanted and really nothing more than a mistake of my parents. You see, I grew up as a lot of us did with an alcoholic father and a mother who was just too weak to stand up to him (please know I believe she did her very best.) So the story that I have told myself my whole life is that my mom and dad already had four other children (she had me at 41 and back then that was not a popular age to be childbearing) and there was no way that she wanted to have another child with man who was an alcoholic. Can you blame her? I mean, who would really deep down want that? I get it and don’t blame her one bit.

When I look back it is so evident that my mom was not at all an affectionate person. To be honest, I actually never remember being invited to crawl up in her lap just so she could make me feel special and just love on me. In fact, I never even remember sitting in my mom’s lap at all. Maybe I did, but I just have no memory of it. When I was young and had those moments of being disappointed or when I felt that I had been purposefully excluded from something special like a birthday party or sleepover, I never remember my mom trying to comfort me or build me up and tell me that I was an amazing kiddo even though someone had intentionally left me out it didn’t change how valuable I was. Every kiddo needs someone to tell them how valuable they are.  I don’t remember that coming from my parents at all. Unfortunately, most of my memories are actually filled with thoughts that most people wouldn’t ever want to have to rethink.

So, why on earth would I be telling you such a sad and negative story?

I tell you all that so I can share the pure joy and excitement I have had from finding out what God’s Word says about me and you. I really love the book of Ephesians. I especially love reading the amplified version of this book because it gives me such an amazing visual of God’s love. For example, in the Amplified Ephesians 1:4 says: Even as [in His love] He CHOSE us [actually picked us out for Himself as His own] in Christ BEFORE the foundation of the world… I have to ask myself after reading that, how can I continue to allow myself to feel unwanted when the Creator of the universe has told me that HE picked me out ON PURPOSE! The reason it gives me such joy to read this is because of that toxic stronghold in my mind of being unwanted. That stronghold has affected every part of my life because I have believed that I was never meant to be born and that there was really no purpose for me. I thought I was nothing more than a big mistake. BUT GOD! tells me different. He tells me that I, Renee, was set apart, CHOSEN before He even made the world. Do you now what that means to me? I wasn’t a mistake, I WAS ON PURPOSE. His purpose. Perhaps my parents didn’t plan for me and maybe they really didn’t want me, BUT GOD DID. And if God planned me that means He has a purpose for me.

So, if you are struggling with a feeling of being a mistake, unwanted or that your life has no value, I want you to know that is a lie straight from the enemy to keep you from being the incredible creation God has made you to be! God chose YOU to be HIS. You are so important that He made sure He chose you before He even made a place to put you. He wanted to be sure that you were His before He did anything else. Why? Because He loves you wants to be sure He gets to spend eternity with YOU! You can’t be more unwanted than to be chosen by the Creator of the universe. You are His hand picked delight that He actually hand picked for Himself. The Creator of ALL things PICKED YOU!! WOW!!! I would say that makes YOU incredibly valuable and undoubtedly wanted!

Psalm 139:14
I am fearfully and wonderfully made.

John 8:36
I am FREE

Eph 1:4

Even before He made the world, God LOVED me and chose me.

Jer 1:5
I chose you BEFORE I formed you in the womb; I set you apart BEFORE you were born!

Jer 29:11
I know what I have planned for you. I have plans to prosper you, not to harm you. I have plans to give you a future filled with HOPE!

UPgraded & Paid in Full

UPgraded & Paid in Full

upgraded2

As most of you know this past year has been a doozy for me. Between starting a new position, traveling for work, going to school, and helping my husband through a victory over renal cancer it’s been a year I don’t think I will ever forget.

(more…)

3 Tips For Making It In Your Male Dominated Career

3 Tips For Making It In Your Male Dominated Career

female fire fighters

Photo by Dawn Feldhaus

I recently read an article “Tips on making it in a man’s field” by Lesley Kennedy in MORE magazine. Here are the 3 tips.

1. Be A Standout: Bring the right abilities to the job and deliver value every day. Embrace your job from the perspective that you were going to do it until the day you retire and be the best at it. Out perform anyone else in your position.

2.  Don’t Box Yourself In: Don’t be narrow minded, instead be open to diverse opportunities that will broaden your skills. Step up to these opportunities early as possible in your career because as you are promoted they become less frequent. Consider these as investments into your career

3. Take Time For A Personal Life: Being outstanding will require some trade-offs. BUT don’t trade-off your personal life. Be sure and keep the personal events in life that make your life fuller. Five or 10 years from today working overtime won’t matter in comparison to the time you spent and memories made with family.

So there you have it. 3 tips on how to start working your way up the ladder if you choose to climb.

Change Your Thoughts to Win the Battle

Change Your Thoughts to Win the Battle

cover

Anyone that knows me, especially on Facebook, knows that I try to be very transparent. I am a very bold outspoken person, but it takes a whole other level to expose the weak parts of who I am. There is only one reason I am willing to do this. I gain wisdom and growth from seeing others who are willing to expose the struggles they have had and eventually have overcome. It gives me hope.

That is why I expose myself in a transparent way hoping to impact others, even if it’s only one that I happen to touch. I do so even knowing that others will judge me. Well I say I hope it doesn’t hurt when they fall from their high place and raspberries to them!

My struggle lately? Negative thoughts. So, I have recently started RE-READING some books on the mind which talk about how to transform your thought life to lin up with the Word of God so that you can walk in victory. Lately, I am struggling with negative thoughts about myself, Those thoughts tell me I will always be stuck where I am and I couldn’t possibly live out my dreams.  I intellectually know that those thoughts come from my flesh because I God’s Word tells me I am already all that I need to be in my spirit. Those negative thoughts are keeping me stuck in a place (I am not necessarily meaning a physical place) that I know is NOT God’s best for me. I know what God’s Word says, but it doesn’t always compute in my belief system. I have no problem believing great things for you, I just struggle believing they could happen for me. That is so what the enemy wants for all of us to beliieve. Satan wants us to believe what God’s Word says about us is not true. I believe that something HUGE is on the horizon in my life or satan wouldn’t be working overtime to try and convince me otherwise. #amazingthingstocome

BUT GOD!!! I love those words.

Below is one of my most favorite quotes from the book “The Battle for the Mind” by Noel Jones.

“God doesn’t always change your situation, He changes your mind. If God would change your situation, while your mind remains unchanged, then you would still be attached to your mind and your mind attached to the situation, even though God has changed the situation. What God wants the believer to know is that if He changes your mind, then YOU can change your situation.”

I love that thought.

Stop Living Out of Someone Else’s Head!

Stop Living Out of Someone Else’s Head!

pretending to beSo happy I go to Saturday evening church. Rainy Sunday morning…lovin it.  If you really know me, you know that I will be completely transparent when I believe God has given me something of great value to share. It’s one of those moments.

I believe over the past few weeks He has had me on the Potter’s wheel, reshaping what I have thought about myself for along time now. It’s never, ever easy to be molded and shaped into a new form, at least not for myself. But what I do know is that God only designs good and beautiful things. Anytime God has His Potter’s hands on you, allow Him to change the shape of what you think you are supposed to look like into what He KNOWS you already look like.

I spent some time in the Word this morning and then did some reflecting. I know that God has a huge plan for each one of us. For me, I have become more determined then ever to discover what mine is. I have come to realize that I have been living out of someone else’s head for a very long time when it comes to my destiny. I have finally decide NO MORE WILL I LIVE FROM A POSITION OF WHAT SOMEONE ELSE MAY EXPECT ME TO BE…this child of God’s is ready to step into His perfect will for ME!! Others may not understand it or even agree with it, but all I have to say to them is, go talk with God.

My greatest hurdle, those old tapes that play in my mind. They can be so loud at times. But I am working hard on erasing and replacing those old mindsets that have held me captive in places I no longer want to be. I am so ready for truth to just flood over my mind. The Word says we have the mind of Christ, Phil 2:16 and it’s available for us at anytime. God has given me everything I could possibly need to overcome. If I am seeking to line myself up with God’s destiny for my life, then I must believe that He will equip me with everything to fulfill it. God will never, ever, ever set us up for failure. So, any thought I may have about possibly failing at the will of God for my life is a complete lie from satan. It doesn’t mean I won’t have challenges or even set backs, but with God on my side, what do I have to fear?

Recently I have had the thought that I don’t even know who I am anymore. Then God gave me this awesome revelation. When you live out of someone else’s head, being defined by what you think they expect you to be, you will always lose who you are because that is not how He designed us to live. We are designed to be what God planned for us to be before the foundation of the world. In His plan is the only place we find true identity, happiness, hope and fulfillment.  When we seek to be someone outside of that, we will always feel as though we don’t know who we are. You cannot live with one foot in the Kingdom and another foot in the world and walk in victory. And make no mistake there will be those whom try to get you to stay as you are…don’t let anyone or anything keep you from God’s plan for your life. God’s got your back!

I know it won’t be easy, but I am going to step completely, with both feet in, into my destiny. I have come to understand, nothing can be harder than to live outside the will of God for your life, doing so puts you in a place of complete hopelessness.